I – as do so many others – have many goals. Perhaps too many. Will I be able to accomplish them all? Will I be able to accomplish any of them?
Sometimes, the answer to that seems to only be no way. There doesn’t seem to be much hope of success for me. But I must admit after joining a writing-collaboration site called Young Writers Workshop, I feel a bit more encouraged.
Not to mention I fit in there pretty well. Long story, but I’ll give you the short version: Medical issues at 18. Let’s just say my life has been a bit unsettled – almost topsy-turvy – for several years now.
One of my main goals in life is to be more like Christ. I can’t be exactly as He is, but I can do my best to resemble Him. That is my #1 goal.
My second is to write a book–well, several, actually–that are biblical and show characters who lean on God more than on others.
Although, for some reason, this second goal is proving more difficult than I first thought it would be. Writing was once a pretty easy feat. Nowadays, though, it’s become more of a task. Words are less accessible to me, though I still read and write. Just not as much.
I still want to be a writer. Well, more like an author, really, but that’s looking less and less likely. I have notebooks galore (really). Many have something written in them, but for the most part, a lot of them are pretty much empty.
So many people–on Facebook, on YWW, friends, and family–try to encourage me not to give up. They occasionally give me tips and tricks I can use to succeed. But success is avoiding me. Like … like a cat or dog might avoid the other.
And, like a feline or a canine, when they occasionally face each other, they make a big ruckus. I get occasional moments of inspired writing. I sometimes can get through several pages–okay, more like paragraphs–but the well of inspiration is shallow and runs dry fairly quickly. And no ideas shared with me actually work for very long.
Which is why I often consider quitting altogether. Why should I bother keeping at it? I’m not succeeding–not very much, anyway.